Earlier this week I heard a song by Kate Nash called Foundations and it caught my attention. It wasn’t the beat or the sound but the lyrics that stood out to me (in fact I can’t even remember what the song sounded like!) It is a story about a toxic relationship, where the two engage in almost every behavior known to be detrimental to relationships. There is name calling, pushing buttons, sarcasm, intimidation, possible abuse, alcoholism, comparing to others, unsupportive behavior, undermining, and revenge just to name a few. Even with all this negativity, the relationship continues. Unfortunately this happens quite often due to the partners becoming comfortable in their relationship, being scared to leave, not believing there is better or that they deserve better, or even just reporting that the good times are worth enduring the bad. This type of relationship never has a happy ending for either partner and neither can be truly happy if they stay in the relationship. As you’ll see, her last statement is that she hopes she is not stuck in this one. If you are in a relationship that is truly this bad, there is always ways to get out of it and hope to be in a healthy relationship. Hope you enjoy this example of how not to have a good relationship!
Kate Nash- Foundations
Thursday night, everything’s fine, except you’ve got that look in your eye
when I’m tellin’ a story and you find it boring,
you’re thinking of something to say.
You’ll go along with it then drop it and humiliate me in front of our friends.
Then I’ll use that voice that you find annoyin’ and say something like
“yeah, intelligent input, darlin’, why don’t you just have another beer then?”
Then you’ll call me a b****
and everyone we’re with will be embarrassed,
and I wont give a s***.
My fingertips are holding onto the cracks in our foundation,
and I know that I should let go,
but I can’t.
And every time we fight I know it’s not right,
every time that you’re upset and I smile.
I know I should forget, but I can’t.
You said I must eat so many lemons
’cause I am so bitter.
“I’d rather be with your friends mate ’cause they are much fitter.”
Yes, it was childish and you got aggressive,
and I must admit that I was a bit scared,
but it gives me thrills to wind you up.
Your face is pasty ’cause you’ve gone and got so wasted, what a surprise.
Don’t want to look at your face ’cause it’s makin’ me sick.
You’ve gone and got sick on my trainers,
I only got these yesterday.
Oh, my gosh, I cannot be bothered with this.
Well, I’ll leave you there ’till the mornin’,
and I purposely wont turn the heating on
and dear God, I hope I’m not stuck with this one.