Bearing All the Togetherness of the Holidays

Thanksgiving is approaching and for some, this is a favorite holiday. Images of golden turkeys with fluffy stuffing and bright cranberry sauce leave our mouths watering. But what if your images of thanksgiving are more of boredom, family tension and arguments, or any other event that leaves you dreading this time together? Well, there are some ways that you can deal with this holiday and make it through long enough to taste some of your favorite foods.

1. Focus on the positives. Even though Grandma is always very negative and hounds you about finding a spouse, you can focus on how good her pie is every year and be thankful for having her there with you. So Crazy Uncle Bill will be joining you this year? Instead of focusing on how his lisp drives you crazy as he talks, think about how smart of a guy he is when it comes to finances and what you might be able to learn from him.

2. You can choose who you spend the holiday with and this may not be your family. For some of us, our family is down right toxic for us. Do not feel as though you have to spend the day with them anyways. You have the right to choose who you will be spending your time with and you may choose to have dinner with some close friends who feel more like family than your real one does.

3. Figure out what bothers you most and find a way to control it if you can. For instance, if you become annoyed because your sister always wants to host Thanksgiving, but then serves up a tofurkey instead of a turkey, bring a turkey for everyone to enjoy and share. If you are hosting and become frustrated when relatives over stay their welcome, be clear ahead of time when you would like for them to show up and also let them know when you need them to leave by, in a nice way of course such as by letting them know you have somewhere else you must be.

4. For those things that you cannot control, come up with possible ways you can respond to them ahead of time. Yes, sometimes we are thrown an unexpected curve ball and don’t have time to plan a response but we also know that certain family members have their own quirks that get to us. Think about how your cousin always brings up a past memory that you care to not revisit and you end up arguing about it each year. Plan ahead to figure out a nice way to handle the situation and nip it in the bud before you are in that position and you are more likely to be able to squash it instead of making it into a bigger deal.

5. If all else fails, remember that this is just one day of the year. You can be thankful that this does not happen more frequently and allow the small things to roll off your back as you enjoy a day with family.

These are just a few ways you can deal with spending the holiday with family. Please share your tricks for making it through to Black Friday in one piece!


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